Because I thought "who says that to a stranger with an absolute finality"! Gosh. I realised I had zero tolerance for a man who cuts across as ignorant and lacks perception.
So I kept asking him in high tones, why he thinks I look down on him, why he feels I am an Abuja big girl without ever visiting to see if I was even paying rent at all in Abuja...and many other stuff. I was thoroughly pissed, moreso because he visited me (at my vacation spot) and met me without make up on or even dressed up for work.
Maybe I am bush and still stuck up in believing people for who I find them to be, and moreso listen to what my spirit says about them that made me not able to understand his mindset.
He however kept apologising on phone and saying that from my background, he only needed to ask nicely because he is afraid of rejection. The more he explained the more I pitied him...so I asked that we ended the phone conversation.
After all, I wasn't making any headway with the conversation moreover even if I succeeded in explaining to him who I really am as against what he thinks, what will I stand to gain?
I refuse to "gain" a man who thinks like that.
For God's sake, we are still strangers to ourselves.
Moving on, 2 weeks after, I did a post which was actually a "Cancer awareness game" where I said "I think i am in love with someone, but i don't know what to do"...(thanks to everyone who played it with me, lolz) then my facebook lover, drops a non-relevant comment which i ignored.
Then in a flash, i got a direct message on facebook from him saying that (paraphrased): "he has moved on and i am invited to his marriage introduction on Sept 5th. He went on to say that he is happy to have found the girl (in 3 weeks i guess, lolz) and with the way i 'shouted' on him, he was sure if he had made the mistake of marrying me, he was sure to commit suicide at some point. He also said that now he knows why men flee from me!" (Hmmmnn, serious insinuations you must think, especially for a man who have never gisted with me or known me)
So i replied that i wish him the best with his Sept 5th babe he would have made miserable if i had 'stupidly' agreed to marrying him. Then i asked that he dumps his "low self esteem" and grow up...bla bla bla, adding that God is ever present to help him and his mindset.
He replies, that he knows who he is and doesn't have time for scammers and self- acclaimed social media trainers who deceive people in the name of packaging. He also threatened that he would "block" me on facebook if .... bla bla bla....that he can see i needed explanation for why he "left" me..lolz.....(I can't stop laughing). I still wonder if he felt we were in a relationship by chatting on facebook, for him to have said 'left". #SMH
I knew there was no more remedy for his mindset.
So while i got several responses, i proceeded to block him first and updated my Facebook status with BLOCKED!. Hehehehe
Then hours later, i get an sms saying this:
"se u say u sabi yab, u don run? (referring to my blocking him on facebook) Mumu! Instead of 2 get a life nd leave u, just sey disturb person wey no get ur time. sebi u say u sabi yab person, oya! e don set. Old cargo, wen una don useless una self finish, una go dey luk 4 one mumu wey una go turn 2 houseboy all in d name of luv. Imagine local breed like u wey never even step out b4 dey follow me dey run mouth. U wan show me say u dey hear english, lol...i don die, no bi ur type. U no reach."
From this, he posited that i was a worn out old chick looking for a younger boy to prey on after having sexually spoilt my chances for a husband.
He also made it sound like i call him or send him messages to see or chat with him amongst other accusations. But like i always say:
1. Nobody will believe you are a virgin at 40, but that shouldn't make you to try sex outside your convictions. People are free to think what they want about you anyway.
2. You can inspire people and pass off as an Angel but can also be termed a serial murderer or cheap slut because they hardly know you. And again, assumptions are free for all.
3. You will meet lotssss of real lovely people on Facebook and social networks (I am a witness) but you will meet some ignoramuses too.
4. Ladies, marriage doesn't define who we are. A good marriage sure gives us an outlook/output to life that changes the universe; so choosing who leads us on that life journey is not by considering a man who is going nowhere and moreso can't learn.
5. You can have a larger-than life disposition because that is really who you are; don't beat yourself, accept it and live it.
6. Ladies, TDH (Tall, Dark, Handsome) may be your dream man like this guy but trust me, you need that and much more a 'content' that is reasonable, understanding and more. Talk about TDH gone wrong...gosh! What is a container, without content!
7. Writing is therapeutic and you should try it for circumstances that make you wonder, pause, laugh, cry, think or just downright remarkable. Share by all means. I have decided to write more. yay!
Guys, we can't do without you in this planet BUT you should lead. A woman needs to know that she can take instructions from you and submit to your 'government'. It makes us feel safe and function well.
Guys, never cower for a woman when your intentions are right...I know some guys can preach this better than me, my friend Sucex is one (Kudos boss).
Seriously, I think I can render some help in "how tos" for men, who wouldn't mind. I have a good CV from helping some of my guy-friends with issues of self esteem towards life, work and their women. I'm ain't joking.
I'm sure some cute, godly, lovely companion of mine is reading this and smiling. Thanks darling for allowing me to be me...
Thanks for reading y'all.