My Promise To Men...
I promised yesterday on Facebook after our very engaging discussion on 'men and bottling emotions to death', to write on the topic "10 disastrous decisions men make because of the male victimization mindset" today.
I am sure a few men reading this may say, Men? Victims?...and I would say Yes, most men honestly agreed to the fact that 'they bottle up emotions because they feel no one will believe their pain and also that society had a redetermined mindset about men, that makes them rather shut up than share and be vulnerable" and it was a fact I had come to know prior from research and dealing with men.
You know what happens when I hear "men" abi? If you do not know, I would say that the male gender are very important in the scheme of life and I am so passionate about them that I began providing an advocacy as well as programme support for them.
I am even as crazy as organising with 6 coaches and very expensive therapists to help men who seek for love deeply after having gone though divorce, widowerhood, disability, separation and or been repeatedly heart broken to find love again sometime this September.
I even refocused my blog of 7 years as at 2016 to focus on men...yea I am that crazy. That is how my love bank is. It overflows without fear in anything I am driven to do.
I focus on men for posterity sake - our children are modelling their lifestyle as older brothers, uncles, fathers, teachers etc and my mission is the sustainability of the FAMILY unit.
If you have read this far, congratulation!! Here are the 10 reasons every man should quit the victimisation mindset that make him bottle up emotions till death.
1. Keeps you from having great sex because you cannot communicate how you want it.
2. Makes you choose the wrong spouse by dancing to other people’s opinion.
3. Keeps you in a job you hate due to fear to find another job you desire or start a business you love.
4. Makes you use sex destructively by having random sex with ‘available’ women because that mindset makes you believe that all other men do same. So not because you really want sex but you want to please your clique and massage your idea of masculinity.
5. Makes you spend without investing just to please/impress a woman or women or not feel left out. We used to think peer pressure was just for teenagers? But No.
6. Makes you condone all sorts of abuse especially emotionally just to be termed gentle man and avoid being misunderstood.
7. Makes you raise emotionally weak and depression/suicidal-prone children.
8. Makes you become available prey for girls. Remember girls and women now go for sex with who they want. This is 2018 not 1980.
9. Leaves you burnt out due to lack of adequate support system – a close group of people you can be real with. And also because you did not have the wisdom and strength to make your wife your confidant in all matters; remember that destructive thing they told you that ‘women are like children, it’s not everything you tell them” so you have remained ‘single’ and alone even in marriage.
10. Consequently, you grow old and die the way of over 90% of men - full of regrets. All the ‘I should have’, ‘I wanted to’, ‘I could have’ will come hunting you.
… and, the cycle continues, because even at death, most men still do not open up on their struggles and regrets to their sons so they can perhaps avoid such a waste of life.
Run for your life!
Nobody loves you more than you love yourself. Do you really love your life?
By the way...
How Can You Avoid Such a life and get control of your life decisions and outcomes:
Goodnews, I wrote MEN CODE: to help you get your life back. Get it here now, and it is a book you need on your phone daily thus it is in digital format. With it you can begin your daily journey until you become that man that will build a strong family and be fulfilled before you go back to your maker. The world needs you whole, do not join the statistics.